The Biggest Obstacle to Awareness
Have you ever read a book (or have watched a movie) the second time and were almost sure that particular line wasn’t there before?
It was there but your awareness wasn’t at that level yet, so you couldn’t see it.
You are only able to see what your perception allows you to see.
The answer to any question and solution to any problem might be sitting just right in front of you, but you may not see it because your perception is completely different.
Why Don’t People See the Obvious?
People don’t see things when the seeing of them is painful and when the seeing of them would mean that they have to make some kind of change that they think would be painful.
This is why people remain stuck.
Let’s say that a woman is in a relationship with an alcoholic husband who also beats the kids. She is refusing to see reality for what it is and is constantly making excuses because seeing would mean that she would have to see herself as someone who enables the abuse of her children. And if she stands up against it, it could lead to conflict and possibly divorce, that she is not ready for, so she thinks it would be more painful for her to see reality for what it is.
But without awareness, nothing would ever change.
Why Awareness is So Important?
Awareness is the first step to change.
When we become aware of something, it usually implies taking responsibility and making some kind of change, because after becoming aware, not making a change becomes even more painful.
Everybody has their own subjective truth and each of them is equally valid. But there is also objective truth, which comprises of all truths.
Without awareness, your subjective reality seems to be very solid and it looks like the only truth.
You may think “he is an addict so you should not be in a relationship with him.”
When you start expanding your awareness, your perception of reality will weaken and you may now think “he is an addict but maybe every one of us is addicted to something.”
Now your perception of reality is still solid, but it is more objective than subjective, and you may think “everyone is addicted to something and this is the strategy that he uses to avoid the pain he can’t resolve any other way.
When you have a struggle seeing things because of the potential pain, it is important that you start to question the meaning you gave to the situation.
Just because you see something, doesn’t automatically mean something.
Remember that nothing has meaning except for the meaning you give it.
The Need to See Ourselves as Good
From the ego perspective, survival is dependent upon the approval of our social group, so losing approval in that social group is obviously a bad thing.
We have been taught that our place in society is guaranteed by being good.
So, when we are doing something that is considered bad, instead of correcting it, we are more likely to not see that about ourselves.
People refuse to see things in themselves that make them “bad” or “wrong”, or mean that they would have to make some change to their personality or behavior that they consider to be painful.
Our need to see ourselves as good prevents as from self-awareness and keeps us operating from our subconscious mind.
People who are not aware of this are potentially dangerous because they have already decided that they are good, whatever they might be doing.
Only when you become aware of your shadow and take compassionate care of it, you’ll be able to make conscious decisions in your life, instead of operating from your subconscious mind which is more likely to negatively affect your own life or the lives of those around you.
Sometimes when we can’t deal with something painful, in order to avoid despair, we simply refuse to perceive it.
This is a form of denial. It is an unconscious state of being and it implies powerlessness.
We came here to expand. Expansion is about becoming conscious. If you’re in a state of denial, you’re completely unconscious of something.
Some people see that something exists, but their denial comes from minimalizing the impact it has on something, through excusing it or rationalizing it.
The issue with denial is that it is a state of resistance. Whatever we resist persists.
Any tool that you’re using to fuel denial is an enemy to awareness because unless you know where you are and where you want to be, you can’t figure out how to get from point A to point B.
Awakening is all about expanding awareness.
Ask yourself “What pain are you avoiding by refusing to see and accept that? What would be so bad about accepting it? “
Become aware of what pain you’re trying to avoid by not seeing, hearing, feeling, and accepting certain things. Become aware of the painful meaning you are adding to that what you don’t want to see.
The more open you are to consciously face the pain that you want to avoid the less avoidant you will be of awareness and the closer to full awakening.
If you have any questions or comments feel free to leave them below and I’ll be more than happy to help you out.