There are people who argue that all men or all women are the same. They usually talk like this after they were hurt, left, cheated or disappointed in some other way. Are you the one who thinks this way?
So, are they really the same?
No way, no one is the same as the other. There are people that have the same behavior pattern, and there is a reason why you keep attracting that type of people.
So, what is it all about?
How your partner should look, act or behave?
Many people have their own opinion about how they and others should look, act or behave, but they usually forget that that is just their opinion, not a fact. We think that our partner should look, act or behave in a certain way, but we often forget that we made up those rules.
So, if our partner’s behavior is not in a line with our set of rules, we start thinking that they take us for granted, they don’t love us anymore, they don’t respect us or sometimes we even think they want to hurt us…
Why are you disappointed?
The first thing to bear in mind is that every person is different from the other and every person has their own “set of rules” about people and relationships. No one is right because these rules are not facts. They are just our opinions. They are something we made up or picked up from other people.
If we expect our partners to behave according to our “rules” just because we think these rules are generally accepted, we will end up disappointed.
Why does the same type of men/women keep coming your way when you want something different?
Why is this always happening to me? If you keep asking yourself this question, you should know that nothing is happening to you, you attract people according to your subconscious beliefs.
We don’t attract what we want, we attract what we believe. Most of our beliefs are formed when we were very young. They were imprinted in our subconscious mind before the age of six while we observed our parents and people around us. We still have those beliefs unless we have changed them.
So, if, for example, your parents didn’t respect each other, you will most likely attract a partner that won’t respect you or maybe you’ll be the one who won’t have respect for your partner.
If your parents or caregivers were too critical or too protective, you might develop low self-esteem, and it’s likely that you will also keep attracting partners who will not respect you.
If your parents were cheated each other, you might attract a partner who will cheat you or you might be the one who will cheat.
If you couldn’t trust your family or your parents told you that you couldn’t trust people, you may hold a belief that you cannot trust people and you will probably attract a partner that will justify your belief.
If you didn’t get enough love, even if you think you accepted that, you will carry that energy and will attract a partner who will make you feel unlovable.
You have to recognize that there is the pattern you keep attracting, so you can stop creating the same experience.
What can you do about it?
- Be aware of your expectations
We can’t change something unless we are aware of it. Ask yourself what your expectations are and write them down. Then ask yourself why do you have those expectations. Do you have them just because you think that’s the way people should behave in a relationship or it has some meaning for you? Are you expressing who you really want to be or you are expressing the program that you were given when you were young?
- Be aware of your feelings
How do you feel? Is there the same feeling every time your expectations are not met? Are you constantly bound to the same type of emotion? Researchers show that we are kind of addicted to our emotions and tend to attract the same circumstances to justify our addiction. When we do repeatedly something that hurts us, it is because it gives us an immediate emotional reward.
We have to recognize our feelings toward others for what they are and not for what our conditioning has made them out to be.
- Communicate, communicate, communicate!
As you probably know, communication is the most important thing in every relationship. Nobody can read your mind, so if you don’t communicate your wishes, desires, feelings, beliefs, and plans to your partner, you can’t expect of them to please you. Also, you might want to please your partner so ask them about their wishes, desires, and expectations.
- Focus on good things
We always get what we believe is true and what we focus our attention on. If you believe that all men/women are the same, you will probably attract people that will prove you that you’re right. If you are obsessing about the way things have been or could have been then energetically you’re still holding that in your life. Focus on good things and you will attract more of good. We always bring to ourselves situations that meet our beliefs.
- Don’t believe what your mind tells you
Don’t believe what your mind tells you because it tends to think according to our past beliefs and experiences and it always has a need to make you right, rather than happy. When we use our mind, we predict future outcomes using calculations.
- Trust your heart
Don’t estimate the power of your heart. It is much more powerful than your mind. The heart doesn’t do calculations, it reads energy and wants you to be happy.
If you have to make a decision, think about it but when it comes to the final choice, go down to your heart and ask, which one of two choices feels better? Go with the one that feels better in your heart.
We are all different in the way we perceive relationships. We perceive them according to our beliefs. It is not that all men or all women are the same, it is that you attract the same type of partner because you’re the same. Once you become aware of that, you will be able to learn, grow and create a new reality that will resonate with who you have become.
If you have any questions or would like to share your opinion or experience, feel free to leave a comment below…